Judging the Manosphere
Louis Theroux’s latest documentary, Inside the Manosphere on Netflix, provokes strong reactions. It is confronting, unsettling, and at times difficult to sit with. For clarity, the Manosphere is a network of online communities where men discuss issues related to masculinity, gender roles, and relationships, however it’s well known for toxic, misogynistic opinions on these matters. For many viewers of the documentary, anger feels like the most immediate and justified response. The ideas circulating within the Manosphere can feel harmful and deeply at odds with the kind of world we want to build and definitely against who Jesus is , who calls us to a radically different way of relating to others marked by humility, love, selflessness, and gender equality (Philippians 2:3–5, Galatians 3:28).
The documentary highlights a number of recurring messages, all part of the ‘red pill theory’ an ideology which fundamentally ‘argues men are oppressed by feminist-driven societal biases’:
- “People don’t want to see the empowerment of men because it’s a threat.”
- “As a man, no one is going to give you a handout.”
- “If you don’t give a man what he wants, he will leave and find it elsewhere.”
- “Women are born with value because of their beauty and sexuality. Men are not and must earn their value.”
- “One-way monogamy, and permission to explore sexual relationships outside of their marriage, is what a man needs and deserves.”
These statements are provocative, and in many cases, deeply troubling. But if we stop at outrage, we risk missing something essential.
In Australia, male loneliness is widespread, with around 40–50% of men reporting loneliness, one in three lacking reliable support, and middle‑aged men among the most isolated groups (Australian Institute of Health and Welfare, 2023; Australian Institute of Family Studies, 2021; Relationships Australia, 2018; ABC News, 2023). Pornography use is also very common among Australian males: most young men have been exposed to pornography by age 20, and over half of young men aged 15–20 report using pornography at least weekly, with male use far more frequent than among females (Crabbe et al., Australian and New Zealand Journal of Public Health, 2024; SBS News, 2024). Platforms like OnlyFans have become widely used for paid adult content subscriptions and engagement; research suggests that a large majority of subscribers globally are married men, with around 89.5% of OnlyFans users identified as married in recent demographic data (OnlyFans user demographics, 2025).
I want to encourage you to take on a different posture. Rather than slipping into an “us versus them” mindset, let’s pause and look more closely.
These are the messages shaping the inner worlds of many young men.
These are the voices that are moulding them.
These are the figures they are watching.
These are the frameworks they are using to make sense of themselves and their place in the world.
And importantly, these are often filling a gap.
When young men feel unseen, unsupported, or unsure of how to navigate identity and relationships, they will look for answers somewhere. The Manosphere, for all its flaws, offers certainty and belonging. It speaks directly to and validates their fears and frustrations, even if it does so in ways that are ultimately harmful.
If we respond only with criticism or dismissal, we risk reinforcing the very shame and isolation that drive young men towards these spaces in the first place.
And there is already a significant weight of shame for young men to navigate in our culture.
Many young men are growing up in environments where vulnerability is discouraged and emotional expression is stifled. In a world where pornography is normalised, secrecy and shame are strong. There is also a common thread that many men feel villainised and are afraid of being perceived as a predator.
So the question is not simply, “How do we challenge these ideas?”
The deeper question is, “How do we show up for the young men absorbing them?”
What would it look like to flip the script?
What if, instead of pointing fingers, we stepped into their world with curiosity?
What if, instead of condemning, we pursued understanding?
What if we met young men not with judgement, but with compassion and kindness?
What if older men stepped up to challenge this and provide young men with a better, healthier narrative about who they are?
It looks like sitting side by side rather than standing across from one another.
It looks like modelling healthy vulnerability rather than prescribing it.
It looks like creating spaces where young men can be honest without fear of ridicule or rejection.
Because real change does not come from shouting louder than the noise.
It comes from building relationships that are strong enough to cut through it.
If we want a different future for young men, we need to offer something more compelling than the Manosphere; we need to show them that life to the full looks like following Jesus.
As parents, our role is crucial. We need to be just as present, if not more present, than the voices shaping our children through social media. If you have teenagers aged 15 and above, consider watching Inside the Manosphere on Netflix together and pausing throughout to have open conversations. Create space for them to share their thoughts and experiences as you seek to understand their world. Ask curious, open-ended questions rather than telling them what to think. This is an opportunity to build a side-by-side relationship grounded in trust and connection.
Here are some examples of questions you could ask:
- Do you know anyone who thinks like this or watches this content, yourself included?
- How does this make you think about the stuff you see online?
- How do you think that would affect their friendships or family?
- What helps you decide which online groups or messages are worth listening to?
- How do their views compare to what you see in your own life or at school?
- Did anything in this surprise you or make you go, “Wait, really?”
Jesus was a strong, valiant man who also showed emotion openly and pursued the rights of women. He must always be our benchmark and a part of this conversation. This is not a hopeless landscape, it’s an amazing opportunity for Jesus to have the final word!
Our Year 9 workshop empowers students to critically explore the harms of pornography and the sexualisation of culture, grounding their understanding in a Christian worldview that affirms sex as God’s good gift. It equips them with the skills, confidence, and conviction to challenge harmful influences and take practical action for compassion and justice in their communities.
Parents and guardians can book this workshop for their school or church community, alongside our dedicated Parent & Guardian Workshops, which prioritise partnership by equipping you to lead these conversations at home with confidence and care. Each program includes a comprehensive resource bundle (parent letter, follow-up questions, and our So, Where Do I Even Start? Parent & Guardian’s Guide) and an interactive workshop covering cultural influences (from pornography to purity culture), your role in sexual formation, how and when to have “the talk,” what your young people are being taught, and a live Q&A panel.
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